Today I want to talk about gossip. For the past few weeks I have been working with gossip as I see what it does to people. However, I recently found that I have been a focal point of a gossip circle. It does not bother me as I do not take things personal. I tell people to feel sad for those who gossip because gossipers need the drama in their lives to feel alive. I am really quite okay with people who have the need to spread discontent with intent, however, there are people out there who do take gossip personal. I have seen what gossip does to people and their lives and felt that not only a blog but a radio show should be dedicated so people do not have to feel like victims by the perpetrators of gossip.
First, what is gossip? Why do we do it? As I said earlier, gossip is spreading discontent with intent. It is nothing more than insults. It is judgments and criticisms. It is the pure need of people needing to feel good about themselves by talking about others’ errors and faults.
I think there are several reasons why people have the need to spread gossip. I think the number one reason is people are discontent with their own lives and need to feel the drama. When you think about it, drama gives us attention. People get in the habit because that may be the only way they can get attention. In that case, we should feel compassion for these people and not anger or resentment rather pure compassion that this is what they need to do.
Often, since the gossip is about making others look bad, the person that is gossiping more than likely is desperately searching for ways to look good. Why else would they insult, slander or gossip about people? I think people feel proud of their gossip and act as if they may receive karma points. Sadly, they are not getting positive karma.
Let me clear karma up very quickly here. Said in its basic sense, karma is the moral sphere that says that similar actions will lead to similar results. It is that simple. For example, if you gossip, people will gossip about you. It is just that simple as karma is just common sense.
What about those who listen to people who have the desire to cause discontent with intent? Are they equally as bad as the gossiper? Speaking of others’ faults be as harmful as stealing…listening to gossip is as harmful as receiving the stolen goods. Those who listen often judge and convict.
So we all know what gossip is, how do we protect ourselves from these perpetrators of character? Please keep in mind, when you do try to protect yourself, the perpetrators will create scripts and try their hardest to blame and shame you. They will make themselves right and you wrong. There is no need to play into this sort of conduct and let them write their script. They have had it written for a while. Do not bother to try to change it. It is their drama not yours.
For me personally, I have always asked the person to talk to me first before judging. Chances are there is little truth to what was being said. If the person is willing to listen, then by all means, talk openly. If the person has listened and already judged, then let it go. It is not worth your inner peace.
It is important not to be part of the haphazard talk, remember the old saying, “Loose lips sink ships.” The other thing, so before criticizing others, consult your mind first.
It is important to know that the people who gossip about you are suffering from emotional imbalances and they need to create imbalance for others. Remove these people from your life and maintain your balance.
Of course, do not take it personal. It is not worth it. For the most part, you should give it no energy and simply ignore it. Remember energy goes where thought flows, so give it no energy and move on.
Choose compassion for both the gossiper and the listener. We should pray for these people, offer compassion and bless them because they have not learned how to walk a higher path.
For now this is Dr. Tyler Woods saying, walk in peace…