Loving yourself. What a concept. So many people say they love themselves yet they are in poor relationships. People often do not give a considerable amount of thought or even time to self-love because they are too busy avoiding it. It is important to remember that we experience love on so many different levels. We love our children, spouse, parents, siblings and other family members. Sadly, people don’t often realize that the relationships in their lives may suffer because due to their lack of self-love.
Relationships with others that we love tend to suffer when people are not able to love themselves. Many times, people will look at relationship issues and say they lie within the partner when actually the issues reside within the self. Indeed most people do not want to hear this. Many people will deny their own fears and shortcomings. Because of this denial they begin projecting them on to their partner in an attempt to avoid looking within themselves.
That is not a loving relationship and is clearly not self love. Hopefully a time will come when you finally get it. When in the center of all your fears you stop long enough to listen to the voice inside your head crying out — ENOUGH! Enough fighting and struggling to hold on.
That voice will be your awakening. You will realize that it’s time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to come. You will realize someone else cannot make you happy that you must make you happy first.
When that day comes maybe you will stop blaming other people for the things they did or didn’t do to for you. Maybe you will learn that not everyone will be there for you, and that it’s not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and take care of yourself because you love yourself enough. Perhaps through self love you will stop judging and pointing fingers, and you begin to accept people as they are, and overlook their shortcomings. Maybe you will love being with the person you are with rather than keeping track of them and what they have done wrong to you.
Through self love maybe you will begin to look at relationships as they are. So many times we look at relationships as how we want them to be but through self love we learn how to stop trying to control people, situations, and outcomes. We love ourselves enough that we learn that we don’t have the right to demand love on our terms.
Most important, if the relationship is not healthy and you love yourself, you learn to walk away and live again. You realize you no longer need to stay in an unhealthy relationship. The greatest spiritual thing you can do is walk away from dysfunctional relationship, and love yourself unconditionally.
For now this is Dr. Tyler Woods saying walk in self love and walk in peace…